Wednesday, August 22, 2007

my domestic future.

I think that instead of going back to work on Monday, I should become a housewife. That's really what I am right now, except for that whole husband thing. Let's ignore that little detail, because after I paint this lovely picture I presume the suitors will come a running.

I can cook, and I can bake. I can make you a healthy lunch in a reusable lunch bag, and then have a meal ready when you get home. Nearly everything will be made from scratch, when possible. Cookies? All the time. Now, since I'm not working you will need to make a fair amount of money - all this fresh produce isn't cheap! Unless of course you buy a cute little house in the city and we can fill the backyard with a vegetable garden. Hell, let's get some chickens too.

If I start to get bored or depressed because I feel I have no purpose in life, I can volunteer! Just enough to maintain my sanity, but not so much so I can't attend to keeping our humble abode neat and tidy using only environmentally friendly cleaning products. I also have my sewing and craft projects as a back up career, but that could take some time to get started. In the meantime, you have a hole in your pants! Let me fix that, dear.

Sometime in the future we may wish to bear children or adopt. Perfect! I can make organic baby food and sew jumpers for the little ones. And by this point, I'll probably be bored enough to have taken up knitting. There will be booties, booties all over. As the kids get older, I can bring them around the neighborhood with my jogging stroller. I'll befriend other urban moms and we will have lunch and hopscotch dates.

By the time our young ones are ready to start school, I will have enough anecdotes to write a memoir on housewifery. It will sell many copies and the profits will go into college savings accounts. Doesn't life sound grand?

[Heh, I would probably go insane.]

1 comment:

willikat said...

agh, i pretty much felt the same way, only i didn't say so it so well in my blog tonight.